Critics Consensus

Critical Consensus: Soggy "Nacho," Aimless "Drift," Untidy "House"

by | June 15, 2006 | Comments

This week at the movies, we’ve got wrestlers ("Nacho Libre"), Tokyo drifters ("The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift"), time-delayed lovers ("The Lake House"), and lasagna-loving felines ("Garfield: A Tale of Two Kitties"). What do the critics have to say?

I’m sure I speak for much of humanity when I say that each time I see Jack Black in a wrestling outfit on the posters for "Nacho Libre," I chuckle to myself. Heartily. The critics, who’ve actually seen the movie, have been a little less charitable. Black stars as a man who becomes a wrestler to raise money for orphans who live in the monastery where he grew up. While some critics say the film has its share of laughs, others say the sophomore effort of Jared ("Napoleon Dynamite") Hess is the very definition of sophomoric. At 49 percent on the Tomatometer, this "Nacho" is only sort of tasty. And it’s nowhere near "Dynamite" (71 percent).

"Nacho Libre:" Let’s get ready to rumble!

In the third installment of the "Fast and the Furious" franchise, a new collection of thrill seekers head to Japan to engage in "drifting," that exciting brand of motorsport that values oversteering. Let’s be honest: Nobody is going to this one for anything but action, nifty driving, and other assorted cheap thrills (this ain’t "Two-Lane Blacktop"). And even utilizing those limited criteria, "The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift" only attains a modest amount of success. The critics say that while the driving sequences are reasonably cool, the characters are about as well-crafted as a pinewood-derby cart that ends up in a ditch. It’s currently at 41 percent on the Tomatometer, trailing the original "F&F" (at 50 percent).

"Tokyo Drift": Faster and furious to an even greater degree

There are a lot of reasons relationships don’t work out. Sometimes couples live too far apart, or have vastly different schedules. But what about a couple communicating across a two-year time difference — can this relationship be saved? Unfortunately for "The Lake House," starring Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock, the answer appears to be no. The critics say the film’s premise (it’s a remake of the 2002 Korean film "Il Mare") is not necessarily a bad idea, but the execution is off; the film is neither effective as a romance or as a metaphysical puzzle. At 32 percent on the Tomatometer, this "House" looks like a fixer-upper. And how does it compare with "Speed," the last Reeves/Bullock collabo? Do you even need to ask?

"I should probably tell you that I’m taking the bus because I had my driver’s license revoked."

The scribes’ response to "Garfield: A Tale of Two Kitties" has prompted Critical Consensus to paraphrase from Charles Dickens‘ "A Tale of Two Cities": "[The critics] looked at [Garfield] sideways with a stronger concentration of keenness, closeness, and dislike, than was comportable with its wearer’s assumption of indifference." The operative words here are "indifference" and "dislike," as critics say "Garfield" wastes a talented voice cast (Bill Murray, Bob Hoskins, Tim Curry) in a dull, relatively laugh-free plot. At 17 percent on the Tomatometer, the scribes have one thing to say: Bad "Kitties!" (By the way, the original was at 13 percent.)

"Garfield:" Let’s get ready to rumble… again!

Also this week, in limited release: "Wordplay," a doc about New York Times crossword puzzle editor Will Shortz, is at 89 percent; G.W. Pabst‘s silent classic "Pandora’s Box," starring the staggeringly beautiful Louise Brooks, is at 83 percent; the gritty Brazilian love triangle "Lower City" is at 57 percent; the gay cult-fave comic strip adaptation "The Mostly Unfabulous Social Life of Ethan Green" is at 33 percent; and Kevin Bacon‘s second directorial effort, "Loverboy," is at 14 percent.

Movies with the Words "Fast" and "Furious" in their titles:
38% — 2 Fast 2 Furious (2003)
50% — The Fast and the Furious (2001)
N/A — The Fast and the Furious (1954)

Recent Jack Black Movies:
84% — King Kong (2005)
6% — Envy (2004)
35% — Shark Tale (2004)
90% — School of Rock (2003)
49% — Orange County (2002)

Tag Cloud

73rd Emmy Awards LGBTQ lord of the rings hidden camera Women's History Month Apple ID Superheroe italian Netflix Christmas movies suspense The Arrangement Tumblr true crime The Witch SundanceTV Starz Musical VICE robots Pacific Islander TIFF Cannes blaxploitation batman VOD based on movie dexter Hollywood Foreign Press Association E! monster movies saw new york VH1 AMC Plus San Diego Comic-Con Acorn TV critics Pride Month Dark Horse Comics TCA 2017 fast and furious Comics on TV Amazon pirates of the caribbean Alien Hallmark game show Nickelodeon Sundance Now quibi Star Trek toy story versus Apple TV+ DGA Warner Bros. cancelled TV shows Britbox Rocketman spy thriller 24 frames documentary WarnerMedia debate A24 20th Century Fox feel good deadpool CMT theme song Mary Poppins Returns Photos Image Comics adenture 21st Century Fox El Rey women book technology Reality Competition mob game of thrones Character Guide 4/20 kong Baby Yoda Mindy Kaling Quiz die hard Elton John historical drama Comic Book richard e. Grant comedies high school mission: impossible Wes Anderson dragons black comedy adaptation golden globes Calendar Black History Month dc venice festivals Esquire Action gangster Walt Disney Pictures jamie lee curtis Biopics period drama Food Network tv talk Mary Tyler Moore mutant Disney+ Disney Plus Classic Film singing competition stoner heist movie Turner Classic Movies trophy know your critic international japan DC Universe Teen Comedy james bond Sneak Peek BET Awards slashers crossover HBO Max YouTube thriller Musicals Box Office popular TruTV Marathons laika TV Land cults TCA Shondaland archives IMDb TV nature Lucasfilm cancelled television Legendary dogs blockbuster video on demand APB Freeform Tomatazos Lifetime Spike Emmy Nominations Columbia Pictures australia art house series E3 Rocky Adult Swim ghosts prank SDCC Fox News Tokyo Olympics Instagram Live Hallmark Christmas movies Podcast Trivia Universal Winners Polls and Games remakes Writers Guild of America Holidays miniseries Anna Paquin Marvel reboot canceled Toys TCA Winter 2020 Pop TV dreamworks Song of Ice and Fire FX scorecard Fall TV Lionsgate rotten movies we love cinemax 90s romance spain 72 Emmy Awards boxing harry potter cartoon Reality basketball HBO Go The Purge olympics YA zero dark thirty news asian-american Paramount Plus hispanic spanish language zombie trailers Captain marvel emmy awards Chernobyl revenge Fox Searchlight superman hist supernatural Arrowverse Year in Review Exclusive Video young adult Superheroes 45 genre Animation talk show award winner Pop Comedy Central independent spinoff GIFs streaming movies 2017 Best and Worst Amazon Prime diversity space spider-verse spider-man scary movies christmas movies Countdown anthology National Geographic FXX political drama werewolf golden globe awards Disney streaming service Universal Pictures doctor who Crackle transformers Netflix Television Critics Association Lifetime Christmas movies See It Skip It kaiju Winter TV disaster Creative Arts Emmys Spring TV OneApp scary blockbusters joker anime History 2020 psycho YouTube Red First Reviews critic resources Epix IFC Films Chilling Adventures of Sabrina Interview GLAAD 2015 sequel worst movies movie live event Spectrum Originals discovery AMC indiana jones WGN strong female leads Film Festival Sundance TV fresh Black Mirror canceled TV shows twilight Television Academy Country Valentine's Day RT21 name the review target IFC mcc NBA ratings Sundance Disney Holiday foreign comic book movies CBS All Access festival X-Men best Mudbound SXSW Infographic NYCC Shudder HBO Discovery Channel romantic comedy satire films Awards nfl Awards Tour latino leaderboard reviews rt labs RT History Tarantino halloween Red Carpet Pirates binge TV One Disney Channel cars American Society of Cinematographers halloween tv USA Rom-Com witnail FOX Trophy Talk TNT rom-coms royal family Pixar movies TCM CW Seed Watching Series Funimation First Look Certified Fresh legend psychological thriller MCU Masterpiece animated Amazon Prime Video rotten a nightmare on elm street GoT marvel cinematic universe 99% New York Comic Con wonder woman facebook 1990s Neflix HFPA Paramount book adaptation Super Bowl comiccon docudrama sports Star Wars Crunchyroll TV vampires dramedy rt labs critics edition Fargo elevated horror 2018 marvel comics USA Network biopic sag awards stop motion Music cancelled 79th Golden Globes Awards screen actors guild Western CBS medical drama all-time documentaries The Walking Dead aliens Premiere Dates serial killer 2016 razzies TV renewals spanish jurassic park YouTube Premium war social media slasher crime thriller police drama aapi nbcuniversal Binge Guide 93rd Oscars BAFTA south america mockumentary ViacomCBS Paramount Network MTV criterion sequels football PlayStation Emmys The CW 2019 obituary docuseries cancelled TV series child's play green book Prime Video telelvision Opinion The Academy Logo dark parents Mary poppins worst hispanic heritage month TV movies vs. science fiction natural history BBC rt archives breaking bad television ABC Family finale Christmas toronto Bravo TLC DC streaming service Sony Pictures TBS travel streaming A&E Extras Tags: Comedy Fantasy hollywood franchise godzilla Amazon Studios DC Comics Academy Awards superhero Showtime Marvel Television Syfy concert stand-up comedy justice league screenings Tubi MSNBC directors indie biography PaleyFest Disney Plus casting Drama zombies Set visit Broadway Ghostbusters composers Oscars sopranos comics BET Rock Summer LGBT kids king kong Vudu comic books new zealand Hulu classics teaser Ovation Apple TV Plus boxoffice universal monsters Martial Arts french TCA Awards adventure king arthur children's TV Brie Larson Heroines ESPN Turner ABC new star wars movies 71st Emmy Awards BBC One comic book movie chucky cats Trailer Cosplay 2021 Sci-Fi action-comedy President ABC Signature crime unscripted Horror OWN Endgame Grammys 78th Annual Golden Globe Awards Nat Geo CNN Cartoon Network Avengers japanese 007 black Comic-Con@Home 2021 crime drama sitcom posters Film renewed TV shows Ellie Kemper Election NBC Family live action ITV Kids & Family Marvel Studios scene in color Mystery Video Games free movies Pet Sematary Thanksgiving Schedule Nominations BBC America what to watch comic video cops FX on Hulu cooking Travel Channel Stephen King Hear Us Out The Walt Disney Company dceu politics DirecTV PBS Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt Peacock